I'm Now the Mother of a Murloc?
by Alastrine the Light of Dawn
Summary: A paladin slaughters the entirety of the Grimscale murlocs, leaving only an infant behind. Unable to kill it, she decides to take care of it. Hilarity ensues.


Disclaimer: I do not own World of Warcraft, it's owned by Blizzard Entertainment. If I did own it, the only playable race would be murlocs, and the factions would be the different "tribes" of murlocs scattered around Azeroth. I only own this story's narrator, Evagria.

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Under usual circumstances, after slaughtering an entire colony of thieving murlocs, you'd expect someone to turn around and run for the hills, because you _know _there are more in the area coming for your head. This was not one of those times, as I found myself staring at the one lone survivor of my fresh massacre. There it stood... well, cowering away from me would be a better choice of words. It appeared to be crying; it was letting out this terrible noise while mucus and other fluids trickled down from it's flaring nostrils and into it's open maw of a mouth. From a quick glance at the bodies scattered around it, this... _thing_ appeared to be an infant of its kind. I had just killed its parents in front of it, and now I'd have to kill it too. I am _so_ going to burn in hell for this.

As I reached for my sword (which may as well have been a piece of stone tied to a stick), my poor-quality, standard-issue adventurer armour scratched against itself to create a loud, high-pitched squeal of protest. The creature in front of me gave me one wide-eyed look before turning tail and screaming bloody murder down the shoreline. I found myself with a gloved hand on my face as the horrendous sound got fainter. With the knowledge I learned today of murlocs and their tendency to make camps less than 25 feet away from another camp, I knew I was in deep shit. Boy, it would smell pretty bad.

Wasting no more time, I picked up my feet and made a mad dash after the wailing murloc pup. I could picture my rotting cadaver being found on the shore months after my disappearance, finally being laid to rest while a tombstone reading "Here lies Evagria Morningray; killed by two foot tall fish-men". I hastened my pace shortly after the thought passed.

I finally came up behind the murloc, making one last leap of faith and crashing down on top of it. It let out a strangled yelp as I choked on a mouthful of sand. As I scrambled into a standing position, I realized my good-for-nothing, lowest quality gear managed to save my life, as the murloc came up with me, back spikes embedded into my chestplate. It flailed and flopped around wildly in a futile attempt to be freed from the tarnished chain tunic. Rolling my eyes, I grabbed the slimy creature by its sides and threw it back into the sand. Placing a foot onto it to prevent any further escapes, I drew my sword once more and raised it high.

You know that look babies give you when you sneeze, snot running down their face, wide-eyed, and about to let out an ear-shattering scream? And you don't know whether to think it's cute or utterly disgusting? The blasted beast had one plastered on its face. I faltered then. Don't get me wrong; I'm no softy. My innocent ran away from me years ago. I've killed others. I am a proud hero of the Horde. But why in the name of the Sunwell is a _murloc_ making me think twice?

My sword began to feel heavy in my hand. I dropped it to my side with a loud, annoyed sigh. Lifting my foot from the thing and placing it back onto the ground, I flopped down to the sand in front of it with a large scowl on my face. It stayed frozen in its place, and I couldn't help but let out a laugh at its incorruption. It was as harmless as a dove.

Sighing once more, I slowly reached for one of my bags, careful not to spook it further. I opened it and fumbled around inside of it with my hand, feeling around for the item I had on my mind. Finally finding it, I curled my fingers around it and slowly revealed it to the world. A fish. A stinking, disgusting, fish-smelling fish. The pup gave me a weird look, but nonetheless had it's full attention trained on the chum. Slowly once more, I offered it to the murloc. The weird look returned to its face again, and I was sure it was about to get up and run away screaming.

To my surprise, it outstretched a small, webbed hand, grabbing the fish quickly and snapping its arm back to itself in a flash. I chuckled softly at the juvenile action, causing it to jump slightly. I stared at it intently as it did the same to the dead fish; it was torn between trusting a cold-blooded killer and the insatiable hunger it apparently was experiencing. Its large eyes blinked once before chomping down on the fish's head, sealing its choice. I watched as it ate the fish in savage gulps, barely pausing to take breaths. As soon as it was finished, it gave me another look, as if it expected me to hand it another.

"What am I going to eat, huh?" I asked it, cocking my head to the side. It mimicked my actions, giving me an unblinking stare.

Snorting, I found another fish and threw it at it, earning me a loud screech from the infant murloc. It shut its mouth instantly, staring down at the fish before snatching it greedily to its chomps and chowing it down. I watched as it picked the fish clean, leaving the brittle bones in a heap in the sand. It let out a burp soon after, which coaxed a giggle out of me.

I wasn't sure what to do then. I was no murloc master. As I looked at it, it's wide eyes staring back at me in curiosity, thoughts raced through my mind. I was suddenly worried for the poor thing! Was it going to die out here without it's parents? Was it even able to hunt yet? Do murlocs accept murlocs from other tribes? I bit my lip. Okay, maybe I was a _little_ bit soft. I couldn't help it. Baby murlocs were adorable little devils.

I made up my mind then. Since I was the one who slaughtered the parents, I would be the one to care for it. To do that, I'd have to gain it's trust. I figured that since I gave it food, it must have trusted me somewhat already, so I slowly and carefully reached out a hand to it.

Bad idea. The murloc pup shot to its feet and took off like a Plaugelands bear after a level 5 forsaken who decided to explore past Tirisfal. I didn't know what to do. I was too tired to chase it again, and if I leaped onto it again, it would probably hate me even more. I picked up my bags and collected myself from the shoreline, and slowly walked away.

I once had a dog that would only ever come back to you if you pretended you no longer wanted it and started walking away. I figured the same might happen if I left the murloc. I was now back in the dense forest that is Eversong Woods. I skirted around a few angry treants when I heard scuffling from behind me. Glancing back, I spotted none other than the murloc pup running at full speed towards my location.

I was in shock. It came after me! I gleefully turned around and made my way to it as non-threateningly as I possibly could. That's when I noticed the lynx running after it. With a wail, the murloc dove between my legs and put my left calf into a deathgrip. Rolling my eyes, I grabbed my sword and hacked away at the large cat. I ripped away the skin from it's muscle with a small dagger, as some lady in Fairebreeze Village was giving money to anyone who helped cut down on the population. After I had put the hide in my larger pack, I looked back down at the murloc who clung to my leg.

It was shivering as it eyed the now skinless animal. I pondered whether I should slowly and carefully release it from my leg, but it was getting pretty dark and I was never one for gentle actions. I grabbed the murloc by the sides and pried it off of my leg, pulling it to my chest and holding it there with both arms in a bear hug. Of course, it started to create terrible noises. I tried making soothing noises in a way to calm it down, but it wasn't working so good. As I began making my way back to town, numerous other attempts at calming it all resulted in failure. As the outlines of buildings came into my view, I was desperate to shut it up.

The memory of it quieting down at the sight of food sprung into my head. Releasing one arm from it, I reached around to my pack and snaked my hand into it. Finding the remaining piece of food, I snatched it out and waved it in front of the murloc's face. Like magic, it worked. It was fixated on the chunk of cheese and nothing else. I once again put my arm around it, but this time in a way so that the food would still be visible to the pup.

As I entered the town, locals gave me puzzled, shocked, and disgusted expressions. Apparently a baby murloc as a companion pet was foreign to blood elven culture. I reached the inn, and the innkeeper. One look at the murloc and she shook her head.

"Sorry, no pets," she said sharply, folding her arms.

"Listen lady, I've seen at least three hunters in here with their _pets_ since I started lodging here," I shot back, not in the mood for this woman's sass. She made an ugly face, which was probably one of disgust because this murloc _stunk_.

"The only way that thing is staying is if you bathe it immediately," the innkeeper muttered, waving her hand in front of her face, as if that would somehow keep the smell away from her. I shrugged my shoulders and pushed past her in a mad dash to get to my room. I was just starting to notice the vile smell emitting from the little guy. It still appeared to be oblivious to its surroundings, the cheese being the most important thing in the world at the moment.

I fumbled with the lock and kicked the door open with a light foot as soon as the key twisted the mechanisms in place. To my relief, a tub of now-cold, but still usable water, stood near the back of the tiny room. Either the innkeeper knew something like this would happen, or she was implying I desperately needed a bath. Oh well, I have no room to complain. I did just bring a filthy fish-thing into her inn.

Washing the murloc was one of the most difficult things I have ever experienced. I had to toss the cheese aside, since using only one hand to get this thing clean would have been impossible. I'm not sure why, but the murloc really did _not_ like the water. I figured it had swam in cold water before, but it was putting up a big enough of a fight to prove otherwise. Wait... did I somehow traumatize this poor creature into fearing water? Does the life-giving liquid remind it of it's parents' mangled corpses? By the Sunwell, I am a _terrible_ person!

After nearly an hour's worth of fighting, splashing, and screeching, the murloc was nearly sparkling. Halfway through the ordeal, it seemed to have just... given up. The poor thing shook horribly, but no longer fought to get out of my grasp. Great, now I had also broken it's spirit as well.

It was late, and I had a lot of travelling to do as soon as the sun broke into the sky. I used some of the pillows and blankets from my bed to create a sort of nest for the murloc. I wasn't sure how they usually slept, and I wasn't one keen on spying on the humanoids for a living, so it would have to do. I plopped the baby into the mass of different fabrics, blew out the candle, and climbed into bed.

I woke to a scene that only a tornado could possibly create. Everything in the room had been strewn all over the place. Pillows and blankets were now merely scraps of fabric, books were now unreadable, and the small chair and table in the corner of the room had horrible gnaw marks on the legs. Standing in the middle of the disaster was the culprit, wide-eyed with a tendril of mucus dangling from it's nose.

"By the Lord Regent's third nipple, what have you done!" The murloc let out a loud yelp and hid under whatever was left of the blanket I had used as it's nest. The mound of torn fabric trembled as I slipped out of bed and stomped towards it.

"This is what I get for feeling pity! I should have slain you too, but no-" I snapped, ripping the blanket off of the terrified creature, "I have to feel bad and bring you home! Is this what I get for taking care of you? What am I going to do!" I wailed pathetically, sinking to my knees. The murloc hadn't fled after I brought it back out into the open. Instead, it laid on the floor in the fetal position, shaking terribly while staring at me, it's eyes three times larger than they usually were. Just looking at it lessened my anger, but heightened my annoyance.

"Oh, don't give me that look!" I snapped at it again, dropping my face into my hands. "I can't pay for all this damage!"

I took another look around the trashed room. I could barely afford to pay for repairs, let alone the repairs for _this_. My eyes trailed back to the murloc. It had covered it's eyes after I had raised my voice at it again. Snorting, I got up and attempted to tidy the room as best as I could. The chair and table were unfixable, but the torn books and blankets were easy to hide underneath the bed. I put my armour on once more, packed my bags, and stood with my hands on my hip as I stared at the murloc.

An idea sprouted in my mind. I had seen warriors who were parents safely keep their infants tied to their backs, out of harm's reach while also keeping their hands free. I looked at my largest bag, noting the large holes that already scattered across it's surface. Sighing, I dumped the contents back onto the floor and use my sword to create more holes around it. After feeling confident enough, I slowly made my way to the murloc, who eyed me suspiciously.

"Now little murloc, I have to carry you around, but I don't trust you enough to stay by my side. This will keep you safe, and you won't even have to move," I cooed, finally reaching it.

It had backed into a corner of the room, so I simply scooped it up. Of course, it started wailing, but I ignored it as I gently but quickly stuffed it into my newly modified backback. I pulled it's two feet out of the little holes I had cut for them, and pulled the tiestring firmly around it's neck, but not tight enough to cause it harm. Stepping back, I examined my work as the murloc attempted to escape, but failed.

Smiling, I attached my sword to my hip, along with my smaller pouches, and my shield to my back. Finally, I hoisted my new Murloc Bag over my shoulders, securing the little straps across my chest and stomach. Adjusting it a bit, I opened the door, locked it, and made my way hastily down the steps. The innkeeper glanced up at me and rolled her eyes. I walked to her little counter and handed her the key to my room, watching as she hung it back up onto the wall behind her.

"Can I get you anything else? You didn't order breakfast with your room, so I'm assuming you'll need food," she piped, eyeing the murloc strapped to my back. I nodded.

"What do you sell?"

I exited the inn and walked away from it as quickly as I could. I hoped that by the time the innkeeper or her servants checked on my room to clean it, I'd be far, far away. On my way to the Ghostlands, I dug around in one of my bags and pulled out a fish I purchased from the innkeeper. I now had to feed more than just myself, and frowned at the thought of having to pay more for food now. I reached behind my back and realized I had not cut holes in the backpack for it's arms. I unsnapped the straps around my front and gently placed the bag on the floor. I slowly unclipped my sword from the spot on my belt, earning another wide-eyed look from the murloc.

Wasting no time, I swiftly cut two small holes into the bag, fishing into both to pull it's arms out. I handed it the fish (which it took greedily) until I realized it could easily drop it and I wouldn't notice. Frowning, I tried to readjust the straps a bit so I could carry it around my front, and the straps that normally went around my front would go around my back.

Finally happy with my handiwork, I did up the straps before putting it on, and slowly and clumsily slid it on over my head. When the murloc's back sat flush against my chest, I once again thanked armour as I felt it's back spikes poking into the chain link tunic.

I readjusted the bag a bit more, and set off once more. The murloc ate greedily; I suddenly realized I had not fed it last night prior to going to sleep. I mentally slapped myself, as it dawned on me the creature had destroyed my room in an attempt to find something edible to sate it's hunger. "Sorry little guy," I mumbled, gently patting it's head. It yelped at the sudden content, but did not burst into wails, thank the Sunwell. It also dawned on me the murloc had not had anything to drink in about a day... did murlocs even drink? Maybe they absorbed water through their skin while they swam or something.

Puzzled, I reached around my smaller bags once more for a flask of water. Positive it would not be able to drink from it, I had to make a cup out of my hand and pour some into it. As I brought my hand slowly to it's face, it dropped the fish bones it was still holding and touched the water with a bony finger. I heard a _crunch_ as my foot broke the fish bones that had been picked clean.

Seeing it was water, the murloc extended it's tongue and lapped it up. After about three handfuls, I became tired of hand-feeding it and offered it the flask. It seemed confused at first, but took it anyways. I watched from the corner of my eye as it examined the container, then shook it gently. I guess it heard the _slooshing_ of water, and it dumped the contents into it's mouth. It suckled on it gentle, and I reminded myself to somehow mark this flask so my mouth would never come in contact with this one in particular.

To my utter shock and amazement, the murloc handed me back the flask! I had the biggest, dumbest grin on my face as I gently took it from it's tiny hand and put it back in a bag.

"Good little guy!" I praised it, lighting rubbing it's head (I grew tired of saying it, so I assume it's a male). I didn't receive any audible noises from it this time. I grinned wider. We were making progress!

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I hope you'll enjoy this little fanfiction! This is getting longer than I wanted it to be, so I'm going to have to break it up into chapters. I really didn't want to do that, but I don't want this to be one huge page. This idea sprung into my mind as I was levelling my paladin in Eversong Woods, specifically on the quest where you have to kill the Grimscale murlocs. I thought it would be cute, so I'm giving it a try.


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